In case you weren't aware (and I'm willing to wager many of us weren't), September 12th is the US National Video Game Day -- a 24 hour celebration of all things both video-y and game-y, and probably even both of those things together.
It's supposed to be a revel in the digital. An 8bit party. A look back on cutscenes and Water Temples of yore. Dusting off old Ataris and reminiscing about elder times where dinosaurs roamed the earth and Pac-Man was cutting edge.
At least...we're pretty sure it is. While the whole "video games are awesome" vibe is pretty apparent, the actual concept of the holiday is a little less clearly defined than we found acceptable in the era of "60 FPS or bust."
So with that we mind, we decided to break down the vague button-mashing mess that is National Video Game Day, and offer a few more specialized holidays that might do the gaming world a bit more good.
Let's kick things off slow with "Single Planetary Rotation Hyper-optimization of Core Mechanical and Strategic Elements of Recently Recruited Personnel in Matters of Multi-platform Interactive Media" -- or, if that's a little deep for you...