The 2DS Isn’t for You: Why Your Complaints About the 2DS are Totally Irrelevant

Quit hating, the 2DS just isn't for you. Seriously, chillax.

Nintendo, current ruler of all things handheld, recently announced yet another variant of its DS system, the 2DS. It’s a chunky, wedge shapped, non-folding,  non-3D, 3DS!

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Does that confuse you? That’s okay.

It’s not for you.

Seriously. If you already have a 3DS or 3DS XL Nintendo isn’t expecting you to replace it with this thing.

So without further ado, I will counter every complaint I’ve heard about the 2DS so far.

 

“It’s big and bulky!”

Look left, look right. If the left option seems compeltely unappealing under any circumstances, you are: A) Not under the age of 8 B) Not a parent or C) Completely unable to use reason.

 

The 2DS is meant as an introductory system for young gamers. It’s never too early to start an addiction! Small children don’t always have the motor skills for a smaller system.

 

“It’s a stripped down barely functional DS”

My money’s on the mono sound being a stroke of genius designed to encourage young’uns to wear headphones.

Quit complaining that it’s the bare minimum of functionality. Nintendo has confirmed that the 2DS will have all the same features as the 3DS sans the 3D and stereo speakers.

Why is that a good thing? Read the caption, then get in your SUV to take a trip to grandmas. but first hand your 6 year old a 2DS and a set of unplugged headphones. The brilliance of the mono sound move will dawn upon you.

 

“It’s ugly and chunktacular, it’ll never fit in my pocket!

The 2DS is flat and chunky for a reason.

It’s meant for younger gamers and/or mega klutzes. The hinge is one of the first things to break on all the other DS models.

The hinge breaks first… Followed shortly thereafter by your heart.

In theory the 2DS is now more durable because it has eliminated the weakest portion of the 3DS design: hinges. Honestly Nintendo? I for one can’t believe that it’s taken you this long to get back to a slate/tablet/brick form factor.

 

“It’s not even that much cheaper”


Mr. Jackson and his buddy Andrew beg to differ.

The 2DS is cheap compared to its big brothers. Retailing at $129.99 USD it’s significantly cheaper than the other 3DS models who start at $169.99. This is  great if you are:

A) Broke

B) Not willing to shell out a lot of cash for a console for your kids that will inevitably break and/or and/or lose and/or throw it around.

 

So quit complaining that the 2DS sucks.

It doesn’t make you sound clever, it makes you sound shortsighted. If you already have a 3DS why do you even care about it?

 

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