If you ever play games on Facebook and head over to what’s trending, you’ll see Criminal Case sitting pretty at number one. As a hidden object game, you rely on your energy to get you into areas to ‘investigate’ your cases. Which involves just clicking items on a map that correspond with some arbitrary list you’re given. Which sometimes include weird things.
Aside from the strange plot of the game, which is to solve criminal cases by watching a lot of decently animated cut scenes (you get to watch autopsies, yay), you’re basically in some simple-minded version of CSI: Anywhere.
So, how does one play Criminal Case?
Well, you can’t just click super fast all over the map.
Most hidden object games are easily beaten by just furiously clicking all over the map and collecting the items that way. An interesting turn this game takes is to stop that from happening by showing you a ‘We need to calm down…’ screen whenever you click too much, too quickly. I did find this to be at least innovative and keeps people from just spam-clicking the images. They really want you to spend your money.
I mean, look at all this crap. You can see our arbitrary list and an insane amount of other brightly colored items here. Your first instinct is just to click the hell out of this. Well, too bad. You need to calm down.
Getting more than one star is actually pretty difficult.
I may write more on just how to get more than one star on these levels, because even in decent time frames, I haven’t managed it. This game is actually fairly difficult in terms of getting a high score. You need stars to do things, too. They aren’t just your score, they’re currency for analyzing items and performing actions. So have fun spending all of one currency (energy) to get more currency (stars) that you can’t use without the first currency (more energy).
Yes, it’s stupid.
Is it really free?
Nope. In order to buy more energy should you run out, you’ll have to pay some real dollars. Which is insane and I will judge you if you do this, because the energy just regenerates itself and you earn more with each case you complete.
You can also use cash to buy gold coins (yes, I found this redundant) for cosmetic items and boosters. Again, you don’t really need these things as after I completed my first case, I got to customize my character a little so that I’m now a woman. With long curly hair.
Hey, it’s something.
Autopsies have a time delay on them so you cannot just rush through cases.
My first autopsy took maybe 15 seconds? But as I head into my second one, lo and behold, this will take 25 minutes to complete. Another way to keep you from actually doing anything without spending money–which you can do in order to make the autopsy instant. I think I’ll just wait, thanks.
With Criminal Case, you have to make a choice
Time, or money? Which would you rather waste? You’ll spend 25 minutes on your second autopsy alone, which keeps you from really advancing in the game, and analyzing items you find costs stars–which are pretty difficult to get, and each level costs energy. Eventually, you just block yourself until all of the tasks are completed or you have enough of whatever sort of currency and you can move forward.
My advice to you? Unless you like sitting around waiting for things to finish in your queue, find another game. Or spend money. The latter of which, I remind you, will bring my harsh and swift judgement.
