Never Use Duct Tape For Bridge Building — Examining Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare’s Trailer Part 3

They just keep letting him do it so he just keeps writing them. We reach the pre-climax DLC pack of Elijah's peculiar analysis of the latest Call of Duty game's first trailer.
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The duct tape! IT DOES NOTHING!

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"I won't let go Jack!" -- Titanic 3: Michael Bay Attacks

It's pronounced "Kev-een!"

"Deploying Flip the Bird!"

"I never asked for this."

UNLIMITED AMMO! perk only available in YOU GIVE YOUR LIFE TO US Edition.

Next-gen teeth. So real!

I really don't like where this is going...

"Your explosion is nothing compared to MY EXPLOSIO-AHH! I'M BURNING!"

Laserbeaks! Roll out!

"YIPPY!" screams the guy in front.

Just gotta put the car alarm on...

DANGIT! I hit "Self-Destruct" instead! I didn't even get back my deposit on that!

Spider-hand, spider-hand. Does whatever a spider-hand does. How's he drive? Or eat a salad? The only one that knows, is the spider-hand!


Cyberman in the sky. I can go just as high. It's in a book. Just take a look. Readin-"Delete. Delete. Delete. Delete."

Where we're going, we don't even need to make this obvious reference to Back to the Future.

"Come on Janice. You can do this. Everyone said you couldn't, but you can be the best professional garbage can lid thrower the world has ever seen!"

Came here to kick arse and make Kevin Spacey jokes, and I am all out of Kevin Spacey jokes.

Call of Duty's Megabloks sets will now be included as gameplay elements. Choose between the dull gray brick and the dull brown brick!

AH! Jar-Jar's tongue has been weaponized!

The soapy-suds attack fails against their deployable chest high walls! THE SUDS DO NOTHING!

Also, for those of you who missed them, here are links (look below the image) for both Part 1 and Part 2.

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Elijah Beahm
Grumpily ranting at this computer screen since before you were playing Minecraft. For more of my work: