Gotta Go! The number one game about number two.
Do you have a moment to talk about potty humor?
Great. Then let me direct your attention to a game that is founded on one of the most basic tenants of potty humor: Number two. Gotta Go! By Dire Nerd Studios, LLC, has a premise like any one of a thousand TIFU threads on Reddit:
“This is Gus. It is his first day. But Gus has a problem. He’s gotta go! And his co-workers won’t leave him alone. Will he make it in time? Or fall into shame?”
Inspired by one of the developers’ chronic IBS, Gotta Go! is essentially a 3D isometric simulation of this desperate journey.
“Shut up, Karen!”
You control Gus, a male bathroom icon on his urgent search for the porcelain throne whilst avoiding chatty coworkers. If you don’t make it to the bathroom before the timer runs out, you crap your pants in front of all your new coworkers who immediately drop everything and laugh at you.
Time to move again. I hear Alaska's nice.
You can avoid coworkers a few different ways: hiding behind bushes, telling them to “shut up,” or by sprinting past them. The problem with hiding behind bushes is that they never seem to be where you need them. The more viable option is to tell your coworkers to “shut up”. Doing so fills up your Shame-O- Meter. Your Shame-O-Meter carries over from level to level, and if it fills up completely, HR fires you. Sprinting, if you can get it to work, also fills up your Shame-O-Meter. By collecting TPS reports and turning them in (by "collecting" I mean stealing from other people's desks), you can lower your Shame-O-Meter.
Where’s the bathroom?!
Finding the bathroom in time is a matter of trial and error. There’s no map of the level, so you simply pick a direction and hope for the best. (Not like you could ask someone to point it out or anything.) The levels are randomly generated, so you won’t get the same layout twice.
If you need a little more time on your toilet trek, you can fart. Yes, the F key will allow you to crop dust your unsuspecting coworkers. While this adds a five second grace period to your Gastric Gauge, it also means that your fair weather friends scurry off to tattle on you to HR. Evidently, flatulence is not for the faint of heart in this 90’s-inspired cubicle maze. You are only able to drop one unholy stink bomb every 7 seconds, so time your release wisely.
"Oh god no." --Gus, probably.
As a pre-alpha release, not all features of Gotta Go! were fully functional when played. I suspect that one such feature was the sprint option, as it never seemed to work for me. My character would also spontaneously shart himself when the timer was still running and neither of the meters were full. I was not able to get past level 3 in Arcade Mode, though I’m not totally sure this had anything to do with the game’s functionality.
As development progresses, I expect that the aforementioned bugs will be fixed, and that the gameplay will become smoother. Hopefully, Dire Nerd Studios will add additional content in the future to increase play time (for those who can beat level 3). In its current state, Gotta Go! is a simple yet entertaining puzzle game that a wide range of people could enjoy. Dire Nerd Studios expects to release the final version of Gotta Go! in Fall 2016.