15 Game Characters You Wouldn't Want To Meet In Real Life

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They say that you should never meet your idols and with good reason. Chances are you already have an assumption of their character thanks to the media. Bigger chances make it that they're nothing like you thought they would be.

Luckily, video games are nothing like Hollywood. In fact, what you see is what you get and while that may be fine behind the protection of your console and TV screen there are just some characters we don't need stepping out of our TV a la The Ring

Here are 15 characters that you wouldn't want to meet in real life and with good reason. 

Slender Man

Game: Slender Man

While at first glance it might seem silly to add Slender Man to this list, let me remind you that Slender is based off an Urban Legend. 

Urban Legend's sometime turn out to be true and well, after playing the games I think it is safe to say that meeting Slendy isn't ideal. So if you're not looking to run into this sharped dress fellow I would say avoid the forests, abandoned schools, mazes and basements. 

Trevor Phillips

Game: Grande Theft Auto V

Now, I know that Trevor is a pretty awesome character and there's a handful of you that would love to meet a guy this crazy....but you might be just as crazy to want to do a thing like that. 

 If you don't end up in a meth-cooking accident, hanging around Trevor might land you in jail or in a fetal position sobbing while you wear pink pajamas. 

Alma

Game: F.E.A.R

If you have a fear of children, meeting Alma should be completely out of the question. She isn't anywhere close to your average child which makes it even worse. 

Not only will she scare the hell out of you but she'll leave you psychologically scarred, that is if you even survive the meeting.

Pyramid Head

Game: Silent Hill 2

Honestly, if I have to explain to you why you wouldn't want to meet this guy, there's no hope for you. Even, if you've never heard of Silent Hill or played a single game in your life, just by looking at Pyramid Head you should want to turn and run.

Just look at him. He's got a knife that's bigger than you. He's got a helmet that looks like it would, at the very least, give the wearer some tremendous neck problems. He's got an apron stained with a variety of things that all the Cillit Bang in the known universe wouldn't be able to get rid of. Yes, he's a projection of guilt, an apparition that exists simply to punish, but bugger me if he's not the most terrifyingly grotesque abomination that ever shambled its way out of that delightful little hamlet known as Silent Hill. If you meet ol' pointy head, then you've got no one to blame but yourself, and you're the only one who's going to be able to stop him. Or, you know, get flayed to death.

Big Daddy

Game: BioShock

 Who wouldn't want to meet a massive machine housing the corpse of a convict? If that doesn't sound like a pleasant enough character to want to meet, let me turn your attention tot he massive drill Big Daddy happens to call a hand. 

If you have a penchant for being mean to kids, especially little girls, Big Daddy isn't the guy you want to do that in front of. This guy goes 0 to 100 real quick and trust me; Drake has nothing to do with it. 

Eddie Gluskin

Game: Outlast: Whistleblower 

I'm not quite sure how Eddie feels about the womankind but if you're of the male gender, Eddie isn't a guy you want to meet, anywhere. 

Eddie is a character who doesn't understand no, he's also hell bent on making any guy he comes across his bride in the most gruesome of ways. 

A woman's work is never done and apparently neither is Eddie's. 

GLaDOS

Game: Portal

Meeting GLaDOS means that you're about to be put through the ringer and by the ringer I mean a bunch of inhumane tests that could spell out a terrible death if not serious maiming. Who would want to go through that? You know, other than maybe a sadist. 

Sorry GLaDOS, while I enjoy your sense of humor, I've never been a fan of tests. 

Vaas Montenegro

Game: Far Cry 3

 If you've ever seen the Vaas Montenegro Experience, then you know first hand what can come out of meeting him in real life. If you haven't seen it, watch it. After you're done, go sit in a corner and reconsider your life choices if you've ever thought about wanting to meet this Far Cry 3 villain. 

While Vaas' character is modeled off the likeness of his voice actor Michael Mando I have a sneaking suspicion that Mando is a bit more levelheaded so if you really want to meet Vaas, I would say meeting Michael would be a safer alternative. 

Ruvik

Game: The Evil Within

Have you ever met someone who ruins your mood by telling you about how bad their life was and how terrible their day went? Well Ruvik would be that guy multiplied by 1000. Let's not forget that he forces you to live in his own personal hell even though you technically had nothing to do with it. 

What a Debbie Downer. 

Pagan Min

Game: Fary Cry 4

Let's be honest, Pagan's a sharp dresser. In fact, he's probably a guy who would give you some seriously helpful fashion advice while you're out shopping, but his chances of stabbing you to death is frankly a lot higher than the chances you'll leave the store with some new clothes. 

Pagan might have an eloquent way in speaking but don't let a few pretty words fool you. His at times seemingly passive aggressive nature is just a cover up for his sociopathic behavior and boy oh boy it would be a nightmare dealing with someone so unpredictable. 

Not only that, he's particularly anal and if you don't follow what he says to a 't' than you're likely to end up in a very bad way.

I distinctly remember saying, stop the bus. Yes, stop the bus, not shoot the bus. I'm very particular with my words. Stop, shoot, stop, shoot. Do those words sound, the same? I'm sorry, I didn't hear you.. what did you say? Got out of control, I hate when things get out of control.

Richard Trager

Game: Outlast

Finding yourself interning under Richard Trager would be a nightmare for any student of science. The guy is a total nutcase and both morally and ethically inept.

Did I mention that he's also a sadistic and mass-murdering psychopath? Yeah he might be friendly and rather upbeat but in the end, who really is actually that happy? 

FNAF Animatronics

Game: Five Nights At Freddys

Purple Man storyline aside, the Animatronics aren't just moving in search of a killer but because they want to find out where all the kids went. Unfortunately, they're also pre-disposed to assume any human roaming around at night is an endoskeleton without a suit and look to rectify it.

Um, we're all humans so none of us are going to want to meet these guys. EVER. 

Necromorphs

Game: Dead Space

I've seen lists with the likes of Mario and PacMan as characters you wouldn't want to meet due to their "drug addictions" and disregard for others but they don't hold a candle to a Necromorph.

I don't care if it was a summers day with not a single cloud in the sky, not even daylight couldn't make meeting these monstrous things tolerable. 

However, tolerable is the last thing you should worry about because the minute you even see one of these guys you won't be around to say "nice meeting you." 

Albert Wesker

Game: Resident Evil

Anyone with a God Complex is best to be avoided. Albert Wesker unfortunately takes that to the next level as his God Complex leads him to really wanting to become God and the ultimate ruler of the human race.

Not only is this guy power hungry, he is the worst friend you could have and an absolute jerk. He faked his death, back stabbed a bunch of people and even got super powers. Who does that? Not cool, Wesker. Not cool at all. 

Duke Nukem

Game: Duke Nukem

So far, with the other characters on this list you have to worry about your livelihood while with Nukem your main concern is your patience and sanity.

Duke is one of the most arrogant, politically incorrect, muscle flexing video game characters you'll run into. And all the machismo? Just imagine trying to discuss current world politics and social issues with him, let alone ask him "does this make me look fat?" That's going to be a disaster.  

If you're into a "man's man" maybe Duke will be right up your alley, but as for me? No thanks.

So I gave you my opinion on who I think would be the worst characters to meet, now it is your turn. 

Sound off below in the comments with your thoughts and let me know what you think of my list. 

Published Jun. 30th 2015

Columnist

Designer, gamer and geek culture writer.


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