Gotta drink 'em all! Articuno, Zapdos, and Moltres Cocktails for Your Pokemon GO team

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Pokemon GO has been out for a little while now, and since the legendary birds are nowhere to be found, Team Mystic, Team Instinct, and Team Valor are all waiting with bated breath for the release of Articuno, Zapdos, and Moltres. That's where we come in. We've created Team Mystic, Team Instinct, and Team Valor cocktails based on Articuno, Zapdos, and Moltres, the three legendary birds and mascots of the teams. 

Read on for the recipes! If nothing else, you'll be able to drown your sorrows when that jerk down the road takes your gym for the 30th time.

#144 Articuno (Team Mystic)

Ah, the flavors of Team Mystic. This cocktail, based on the majestic Articuno, is a frozen one -- perfect for lazy summer nights. It also features a depth of flavor that evolves as you enjoy the drink, true to Team Mystic's creed.

The recipe itself is fairly simple, assuming you own a blender, or like, a Pokemon with Aurora Beam. We'll be matching the frozen flavors of chilled vodka and lime juice with the oddly sweet and deep flavors of blue curacao here, to both mimic Articuno's iconic blue color and its majestic nature. You're going to want to first fill your blender with around 8 ice cubes from your tray depending on how slushy you want your drink, then pour a shot of chilled vodka over it. Add a half-shot of blue curacao and a splash of lime juice, then blend well until it looks like it came out of a Slurpee machine.

If it gets too icy to blend, simply add a splash of liquid -- whether it's water, lime juice, or more water. Pour into a glass, and then garnish with frozen berries. As you drink, the berries will thaw, and add more tart-sweetness to your drink. It's refreshing and elegant, just like Team Mystic.

TL;DR VERSION

In a blender, add 8 ice cubes, 1.5oz chilled vodka, .75oz blue curacao, and a splash of lime juice. Blend well until slushy, then pour into a glass and garnish with frozen mixed berries.

#145 Zapdos (Team Instinct)

We've all seen the Team Instinct memes. Yes, they have a certain... reputation, and that reputation has now extended to Zapdos, the legendary bird that represents them.

So to create the Zapdos cocktail, we've taken the best qualities of the team and the bird to form a drink you'd never want to order, but one that would become your new favorite drink if you ever did. As you can see from the above image, the Zapdos is a beer cocktail, and it's incredibly simple.

You're going to want to start by making a lemonade base. Mix a good amount of lemon juice and sugar in the bottom of your chosen drinking vessel, though I'd personally hazard against drinking a Zapdos out of anything but a mason jar or beer stein. Taste the base to make sure it's not too sweet or sour, and then grab your favorite shitty beer.

This next part is tricky. You want to overturn the bottle and begin pouring the beer into the stein, but some glasses aren't big enough to accommodate a full beer and the lemonade base. The fix for this is simply ensuring that when you overturn the bottle and pour it in, the mouth of the beer is below the surface of the liquid. That way, the pressure equalizes, and more beer will flow into the glass from the bottle as you drink. Finish off the cocktail with a float of tequila on top and enjoy your reward.

Sure, Mystic and Valor might have more players, and might be stronger teams top to bottom. But there's a value in being the underdog. Those snobby Team Mystic hipsters and the asshole jocks in Team Valor probably wouldn't touch this cocktail with a ten-foot pole, but it's their loss. The refreshing tartness of the Zapdos is yours and yours alone, and we wouldn't have it any other way.

TL;DR VERSION

Mix lemon juice and sugar in the bottom of a large glass or mason jar to taste. Overturn a bottle of cheap beer so that the beer pours into the vessel, but also that the mouth of the beer is below the line of liquid. Float 1.5oz of tequila atop the beer cocktail and enjoy.

#146 Moltres

Team Valor knows the value of a hard day's work. They are strong, motivated, and fiery of spirit -- just like the bird that represents them. Inspired by these values, we've created the Moltres cocktail for Team Valor. The drink requires some elbow grease, but the payoff will be more than worth it in the end.

To begin, make some cinnamon simple syrup. If you've made the Ninetales, you know how to do this already, but for those of you who haven't, it's very easy. Just plop equal parts water and sugar in a pot, and put it on low heat. Once all the sugar dissolves, add 2 cinnamon sticks and reduce the mixture until it becomes thick and takes on a deep cinnamon color.

After that, you're going to cut a ripe peach into slices, and peel a piece of ginger about the size of your thumb. Put about half of the peach slices into a glass with the ginger, and add a few shakes of cayenne pepper (and possibly sugar) to taste.

Then, using a muddler, prove that you're worthy of Team Valor by crushing the flesh of the peach and ginger together with the cayenne pepper. Don't half-ass this. There should be no large pieces of peach or ginger left after you're done muddling. Sure, you could always use the blender, but Team Valor is too proud to rely on the help of a machine like that. Once you're done, fill the glass about halfway with soda water and stir gently.

Now's the fun part. Fill a shot glass about half-way with your cinnamon simple syrup, and then carefully fill the rest of it with any 151-proof rum, so that the rum is lying atop the syrup. Be sure that you don't overfill this shot, and that there's no rum on your table, because we're about to use Fire Blast on this drink.

Now's the time where I tell you that if you've never lit a shot aflame before, don't try this drink. Or at least, have a fire extinguisher ready. Before you ready your match, wipe your table down with a damp rag to ensure that there's absolutely no alcohol there, then carefully wipe the outside of the shot glass as well. Once you're sure you won't burn your house down, light a match and then bring it to the top of your shot glass. The rum will ignite. Don't freak out, it's supposed to do that. Now simply wait for a bit. You want to burn off some of the alcohol, and ideally give the cinnamon simple syrup a bit of burnt flavor.

Then, all that's left is to drop the Fire Blast into the drink.

Stir, and enjoy. You worked hard for this cocktail, and you'll be rewarded with a complex, spicy-sweet cocktail full of freshness and intrigue. Enjoy it.

TL;DR VERSION

In a tall glass, muddle half the flesh of a ripe peach with a thumb-sized piece of ginger and cayenne pepper to taste Fill the glass about halfway full with soda water. Then, prepare the Fire Blast by filling a shot glass about halfway full with cinnamon simple syrup, layering 151-proof rum atop it. Light the Fire Blast aflame, and drop it into the drink. Stir to incorporate the cinnamon simple syrup into the drink and enjoy.

Have you enjoyed our cocktails so far? Let us know your favorites in the comments! We've got much more in store for you guys, so be sure to check out the constantly updating National Drinkedex for a complete list of all of our Pokemon cocktails so far.

Published Aug. 19th 2016

Featured Contributor

RobotsFightingDinosaurs is unlockable by beating the game on Very Hard difficulty without losing a life. You must then defeat him to unlock him for Arcade and Versus modes.


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